One of the hardest things to be in this world is a man. A man is expected to be strong, productive, tough, and principled. He is expected to be a provider, a leader, and fearless. He is expected to do and be all these things without complaining because that is just a man’s role. That is for just the average man. For a black man, things are even harder. He is expected to do all those things and still be numb to the stereotypes fostered on him daily. Well, black men are tired of the vast number of stereotypes. Here is a list of the top 5 stereotypes black men are tired of, and why.
1) We grew up in the hood. While the majority of blacks in America straddle the poverty line, that doesn’t mean that all blacks are relegated to living in the hood. There are a lot of blacks that live in gated communities and are doing very well in America. Even those who don’t have cushy jobs still manage to find suitable employment that grant them the opportunity for suitable living. Tally in the fact that a nationwide regentrification process has moved lower-income families away from the more coveted downtown areas of cities out into the suburbs, and you will see that the average black family is more George Jefferson than J.J. Evans. Besides, we all know, hood is a mentality, not a location.
2) We play basketball or rap. It seems to mainstream America that all black men are titles to a Fabolous song – all we do is Rap and Sex. With hip-hop being so ubiquitous in mainstream culture, people are quick to associate the figures they see on T.V. with the everyday black man. Same goes for basketball. It is inconceivable that a 6’6″ black man would not play basketball. After all, everyone knows that is our ticket out the ghetto, right? Wrong! Believe it or not, there are tons of black men that don’t have any desire to play sports or rap. They are scholars, business owners, postal employees, painters, etc. More importantly, they are perfectly content in the role they have etched for themselves, instead of the prescribed stereotypes society has erected for them.
3) We want to be white. If I hear one more person say that a black man talk or act white, I may lose my mind. What exactly is talking white? So white people are the only people that enunciate words properly? White people are the only people who have a vocabulary that extends past four words? And how exactly, does a white person act? Civilized? (History would beg to differ, but I digress.) It is true that, sometimes, black men have to attempt to minimize their “blackness” (i.e. mannerisms, vocal inflections, etc.) for acceptance into certain echelons of the dominant society. However, this is merely a reactionary defense mechanism to a racist society that fears what it doesn’t bother to understand, not a desire to be white. Doing the opposite would be like bringing a football onto a basketball court and trying to force people to play with it. Sometimes, you have to assimilate until you can manipulate. We challenge the assumption that to be black is to act uncivilized and speak poorly. Isn’t that a Black man in the White House that talks more intelligently than any of his predecessors, and is always sharply dressed (and has people swooning over, or imitating his swagger)? So why is it considered “acting white” when the common black man displays his higher self? That is not being white at all; it is being smart – and that is colorless.
4) We are violent, ignorant thugs. There seems to be this unsubstantiated ideal that black men are all violent thugs. People are quick to scream black-on-black crime to substantiate this, but the sobering reality is that a staggering 83% of whites are killed by other whites. So, what of white-on-white crime? (If we use these stats as a guide, we should lock our doors when Tom walks by instead of Tyrone.) This belief that black men are all violent thugs is the reason cops are gunning us down in the streets without a second thought. What other reason would two white police officers gun down a 12-year old without even ascertaining any facts first? Why else would police officers feel the need to fire so many shots at young black males? (Hell, they only use one shot to take down a deer.) It is the unfounded fear that all black men are violent thugs. Where does this assumption come from? Maybe the media. . .
5) We want to either marry white women or rape them. Ask any black man what he does when he walks down the street behind a white woman at night, and the answer would probably be similar. We go out of our way to ensure she knows that we are not a threat, even to the point of walking across the street. Why? Because some of us remember Emmitt Till, the young black man who was brutally killed and beaten for supposedly whistling at a white woman back in the day. Or we subconsciously feel that, although we have seen the curious stares from white women, they still fear us until we prove ourselves harmless. The irony is that a lot of white women actually desire us -openly and secretly. No? Ask a white woman the description of her ideal mate. Most will say, tall, dark, and handsome. Does that sound like a white man to you? Also, although a lot of black men are in relationships with white women, a huge majority still desire black women, evidenced by the small percentages of interracial marriages (nationwide.) Despite these facts, there is still a prevailing stereotype that all black men want white women, in some way or another. This is untrue and unfair. We are tired of it.
Looking at the trends in popular society, it seems as if everyone wants to be Black until it’s time to be Black. It is okay to partake in the culture we have created, and use it to advertise to the world. It is okay to solicit our votes in your political campaigns when you need additional numbers. It is okay to use our gains made during the civil rights movement to further certain agendas. It is even okay to sling around the N-word like a softball. However, no one wants to really be Black. No one wants to get stopped and frisked for the color of their skin. No one wants to go to court and face the criminal injustice system while being Black. No one wants to encounter police at night (or day) and wonder if this will be where they take their last breath. No one wants to diminish their natural aura to appease the insecurities of others. No one wants to have everything they invent scrutinized, only to have it imitated and accepted later. It is easy to formulate stereotypes, but what happens when you have to live with them? 92% of America have no idea because they are not Black males. Thanks, but no thanks. You can keep your stereotypes.
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